Monday, September 23, 2013

Deliver Me

I Shall Not Want
Audrey Assad
From the love of my own comfort
From the fear of having nothing
 From a life of worldly passions
     Deliver me O God
From the need to be understood
From the need to be accepted
From the fear of being lonely
Deliver me O God
Deliver me O God

    And I shall not want, I shall not want
when I taste Your goodness I shall not want
when I taste Your goodness I shall not want

From the fear of serving others
From the fear of death or trial
From the fear of humility
Deliver me O God
Deliver me O God


This weekend I was surprised to stumble upon a few new (to me) blogs written by women who have such beautiful hearts and walks with the Lord that I had to share them with you. I added them to my sidebar blog list but here are the links anyways...

Chatting At The Sky


I found the artist Audrey Assad and her beautiful third album, "Fortunate Fall" through one of my favorite blog posts ever, written on Sayable. The post is called "Giving the Lion His Just Desserts" written on Sept 5, 2013. Click that link and go ahead and read Lore's stunning words. And then sit in silence and wonder at the thought of beating the enemy to the truth about who we are and being delivered from the power of his accusation. Um, yeah. I want to do that more. 

Is that scary? Yes. For me, just NAMING things specifically makes me tremble sometimes. Am I the only one? But I have to wholeheartedly agree that any deliverance I've ever experienced in my life has not come without an honest look at my soul, asking God to help me really see, calling things what they are, and whether it's writing down somewhere what I see in my heart, or praying out loud and putting real words to the abstract or hidden, or (deep breath) telling my husband or a trusted friend about the dark corners that lurk... that is the way I crack the door and let the light in. 

And how it always floods in. Glorious Light. I never fail to find forgiveness and grace in my Savior. I am always surprised (why?) by His goodness to me. The depth of His love that I was sure could not reach below my darkest places. Evidence that I need to engage in this practice more. A lot more. 

So today I'm praying for courage. 

I want to be unafraid of so many things, but I'm starting with freedom from the fear of seeing myself as The Lord sees me. I want so much more courage to name the things I struggle with, to name my sin, and to stop the cycle of accusation and begin to really SEE. Begin to NAME. Begin to kill the lion and stop wasting time trying to tame him.

I wrote this morning in my journal about what it means to cry out to God for deliverance. "Deliver me!"... This isn't my prayer a lot of the time. It's not my battle cry. Mine sounds a lot more like "God, I want... Make me able, Lord..." and while those aren't wrong, I think in my heart and spirit I've missed the mark. Some things in my life? I cannot handle, not on my own. Some things are just God's alone to come in and deliver me from. And that requires total humility and submission on my part. Throwing my hands up and releasing control of all the trying and striving. Letting my Father do the work, in His way and in His perfect time. Keeping the posture of a lowly servant as He works His purposes out in my heart and in my life. 

God, I need you. Deliver me. 

Ephesians 6:10-20

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. 19 Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlesslymake known the mystery of the gospel, 20 for which I am an ambassador in chains.Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.

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